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02/04/16
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Thursday, February 11, 2016

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Monday Movie Review

WANZIE: OMG! This film is relentless in its graphic portrayal of the horrors of Native American vs. White Man warring (complete with “scalpings”) as well as the devastating effects nature, in winter, can have on the human body. Not to mention the damage a North Ameri-can Grizzly can exact on a human. And by the way, that Grizzly - CGI or not - deserves the Oscar more than Leonardo DiCaprio, who may very well walk away with the coveted statuette this year for his role as Hugh Glass in this film. But if you ask me, it’s Tom Hardy as the despicable, lying, thieving, greedy, and murderous John Fitzgerald who gives the stand-out performance in this action-packed and somewhat gory wilderness drama that will leave you breathless.

WANZIE DISCLAIMER: Not a good choice for a Valentine’s Day date movie. (Unless your date would consider the viewing of anal rape on big screen a proper way to celebrate your love and affection for one another.)
4 1/2 Pink Triangles

DOUG:
This was a brutal film to watch, but the violence was never gratuitous. Cinematically it’s a beautiful film. I would have enjoyed a little more script.
4 Pink Triangles

You’re Invited to Wanzie’s Valentine’s Day SINGLES’ PARTY!

If you, like Wanzie, are single and don’t care to sit home alone on Valentine’s Day, but also don’t really care to go out to a restaurant or a bar full of celebrating couples, then why not join Wanzie at Ivanhoe Wine & Spirits for an early evening Singles’ Party on Sunday, February 14?

The music in the store will be cranked up.

Special party lighting will be in effect.

There will be seating brought in so you can take a load off, but you are welcome to dance in the aisles (both of them) if you are so inclined.

Wanzie will be giving out free samples of an Exclusive Singles Valentine’s Day libation made with PAMA, which is a bottled concoction of

all-natural pomegranate juice, premium vodka, and a touch of imported tequila. Bottled at 34 proof, PAMA is highly mixable in a range of cocktails such as PAMA and Champagne, PAMA Cosmo, and the PAMA Mojito. PAMAs versatility gives you endless PAMAbilites. Sample it for free at Wanzie’s Singles’ Party.

There will be complimentary cheese and crackers and other little nimbly delights, along with Wanzie’s homemade Tropical Chicken Salad! So come prepared to nosh.

You are free to enjoy cocktails or beer or wine right in the store on this special occasion.

And here are the best two things about this soiree:

1. 10% of any purchase you might make during the party will be donated to your choice of THEATRE DOWNTOWN or THE CENTER, so come out and drink for charity!

2. Just for showing up you’ll get one complementary raffle ticket. Additional tickets may purchased by donation to either THEATER DOWNTOWN or THE CENTER.

Wanzie and Ivanhoe Wine & Spirits will be giving away a Wine Gift Basket brimming with goodies and home-barware, among other prizes.

So come to the party! Wanzie doesn’t want to be alone in the store on Valentine’s Day unless he has friends there with whom he can share a drink! Wanzie says, “Dew Drop Inn.” And who knows? You may not leave alone!

WANZIE’S VALENTINE’S DAY
SINGLES PARTY

AT THE LIQUOR STORE

Just for those who are
Young   Old   Male   Female   Transitioning

Gay   Straight   Undecided

Everyone Is Welcome!

(Couples are welcome as long as you don’t make an overt display of your connectivity, and are amenable to 3-ways.)

Featuring

Complimentary PAMA Samples!

Complimentary Appetizers!

 Complimentary Raffle Ticket!

Mix & Mingle and Dance In The Aisles!

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 14

6:30 PM - 9:30 PM

IVANHOE WINE & SPIRITS
 1909 N. Orange Avenue
Orlando, FL   32804

10% of purchases donated to your choice of
THEATRE DOWNTOWN or THE CENTER

PAMA® captures the complex, sweet yet tart taste and seductive ruby color of all-natural pomegranates. (Whatever. Just come to the party!)

SAVOY OF ORLANDO - First Ever - FRIENDS CRUISE

Brandon Llewellyn - your ever gregarious owner-host at Savoy Orlando - Ivanhoe Village’s only purveyor of adult libations with scantily-clad dancing twinks atop boxes - has secured a block of cabins specifically for Orlando friends to cruise together aboard Royal Caribbean Majesty Of The Seas at an unbeatable rate: Starting at just $249.00 per person (based on double occupancy) for the 3-night cruise sailing from nearby Port Canaveral to Nassau and Coco Cay private out-island.

To be sure, it’s not about the destination as much as it will be the fun of sailing with like-minded (Gay) individuals who will likely all take advantage of the popular unlimited-bar service option that has now become available on most ships. Brandon will play host of sorts, along with Little Mr. Aztec 2016:

The sailing is not until September 30, 2016, so you’ve plenty of time to plan ahead, but in order to qualify for the group booking you must secure your cabin by February 27 (That’s this month, people!), and you may do so by ponying up a mere $50 deposit by credit or debit card when you dial 407.847.2355.

Fringe Corner

February 29

FAB FRINGE FUNDRAISER AT HARD ROCK LIVE!

DON’T MISS THIS FANTASTIC EVENING OF FOOD, FUN, AND ENTERTAINMENT WITH FRINGE FRIENDS AT HARD ROCK LIVE!

Program:

Video Tribute to 24 Years of Wanzie at Orlando Fringe

LIVE ON STAGE:

THE OOPS GUYS
Dennis T. Giacino & Fiely Matias
MICHELLE KNIGHT     ANDREA CANNY     LISA SLEEPER
T. ROBBY PIGOTT     WANZIE     DOUG     SAK COMEDY LAB
BLUE STAR & VarieTEASE!
MICHAEL MARINACCIO     GEORGE WALLACE

NAKED GUY Y2K REUNION


Montage created by Fiely Matias

Show-Only Admission (Entry at 7:45 pm)
$27.50

VIP Admission includes first-choice dinner seating (7 PM) before show-only folks are admitted. Dinner buffet including salad, entrées and desserts. Access to post-show reception in the exclusive John Lennon Room:
$50.00

407.351.5483 (L-I-V-E)

Wanzie Presents & D Squared Productions are pleased to welcome our very first show sponsors for our upcoming production at the 2016 Orlando International Fringe Theater Festival ons of gratitude to our

PLATINUM TITLE SPONSOR

Huge thanks to our

GOLD TITLE SPONSOR

Much appreciation to our first

SILVER SPONSOR

Loads of thanks to our first

BRONZE SPONSOR

KINDLY PATRONIZE THOSE WHO SUPPORT US

Click on any of the above sponsor logos to connect to their web sites and learn more about these fine companies.

Please join us in patronizing those companies which support live theater in Central Florida!

PLAN TO SEE

Wanzie Presents & D Squared Productions

IN  CLOSE  QUARTERS

A Story of Love & War
Written by
MICHAEL WANZIE

Original Musical Underscoring by
RICH CHARRON

Directed by
CHRIS YAKUBCHIK

Starring
HARRISON FLANDERS   &   ZACHARY LANE

Costumes and Sets by
D Squared Productions

Coming In May to a Fringe Festival Near You!

Silver Venue

Online Box Office

It’s back with an all new experience!

Joe’s NYC Bar
LADIES’ NIGHT

Joe's NYC Bar is an interactive, improvisational, immersive theatre experience in which the audience is transported to a bar in Brooklyn New York. Debuting as part of the 2001 Orlando International Fringe Theatre Festival, Joe's ran for 4 years and 76 performances. In March 2015 Joes returned from a ten year absence and was greeted with positive reviews from critics and audiences alike. The show sold out all 16 performances last year and, returns for all new shows in 2016. Ten years later, Joes has proven to be a concept art piece of theatre more relevant and popular than ever.

"3-D Theater that will pull you in!”
Tyler Gray, Orlando Sentinel

“If you want to understand the promise of interactive theater…take in the triumphant return of Joes NYC Bar.” 
Seth Kubersky, Orlando Weekly

“Artistically, watching the actors is watching pros at the top of their game…Sociologically speaking, observing the audience is like peering through a window into America’s soul.” 
Matt Palm, Orlando Sentinel

“Funny and smart… Highly recommended.” 
Carl F. Gauze, INK 19

“Dont just see the show; BE the show.” 
Steve Schneider, Orlando Weekly

Joe’s NYC Bar
LADIES’ NIGHT

Featuring
Anitra Pritchard-Bryant A Ali Flores, John Connon, Sarah French
 Jenn Gannon, Simon Needham, Christian Kelty,
Christine Robison-Laurence, Jodi Chase, Marty Stonerock, John Chaky

Musical Act For The Entire Run:
Milka Ramos 

Only 6 Performances:

February 14 - March 20 

SUNDAY MATINEES ONLY

Doors 3 PM    ShowTime 3:30 PM

$15 Advance/$20 Door, if available

All tickets are general admission. Arrive early for best seat selection.

All shows in 2015 Sold Out! Most were sold out in advance.
Reservations strongly recommended:

RESERVE YOUR ADMISSION NOW

Advertisers
Click the posters below for a larger version
 
  Valentines Day Friday, Feb 12 Feb 12-14
       
 
Saturday, Feb 20 Saturday, Feb 27 Saturday, Mar 5  
Weekly Events Until They Are Not
Click the posters below for a larger version
 
Every Sunday Every Monday Every Monday Every Tuesday
       

 
Every Wednesday Every Thursday Every Thursday  
     
My Two Cents

REFLECTIONS
by Mike Dorman

Or
An Invitation For Religious Right to Move to Iraq:

Rick Santorum, just like Rafael Cruz, Mike Huckabee, and Ben Carson, told us that God told him to run for President. One is left to conclude one of several possible things in light of this information and Santorum's miserable performance and recent departure from the race.

The first would be that uber Catholic Santorum is simply a liar, and like Cruz and the others, sought to get the religious vote by implying divine approval for his efforts.

Another is that God actually did tell Santorum to run, but in a cruel and perverse change of heart, decided to abandon him in favor of Cruz.

A third might be that God doesn't really give a shit about who is the President of the United States because he's having so much fun causing global warming and hurling fireballs through the cosmos.

In summary, it might be the most rational to agree that whatever divine spirit you might believe in, if any,  has never actually had the power (or perhaps the desire)  to elevate any politician  above his own base nature. In like manner, said divine spook also was unable to make Tim Tebow a real NFL quarterback, no matter how much lip service or faux adoration was paid him in the end zone.

In summary, if your vote is being weighed by you in the balance of religious belief, vice competence, you are a fool. If you think Ben Carson's piety and devout pretense outweigh his monumental lack of real knowledge about critical events, you deserve him as President. The same is true for political poseurs Huckabee and Cruz.  If a theocracy seems reasonable to you, move to Iran.  And if you don't believe that Rafael Cruz would seriously support erosion of the rights of any who disagree with his particular brand of evangelical bullying, you have been duped.

I have a friend who mused, "I don't know if I could ever vote for an atheist." I asked them to list for me the crimes of discrimination committed by atheists against those who disagree with them (crickets chirping). After no response, I listed just a few of the horrendous crimes committed by persons of faith against those with whom they disagree. It is a long and disheartening list in the 20th century alone. The least enemy of the religious person in America is the atheist or agnostic who believes that each is entitled to their own cosmological belief, and that they are also entitled to be free from having others' views forced upon them. The religious right is neither in current context. Based on their operator's manual, the New Testament, they are not truly religious, and based on the lack of congruency between the teachings of their prophets and their own avarice, bigotry and intolerance, they are not "right," either.

Mike Dorman is a peace-loving religious rights-respecting atheist who resides with his believer-wife Emily in a harmonious household in The Villages. Mike often attends a Christian church to hear Emily or Daughter Julie sing in the choir, without incident.

Now Playing

Through March 13
NAKED BOYS SINGING

Footlight Theatre

$17- $32
Click Here for Tickets

Through February 14
FUNNY MONEY
Sonnentag Theatre at The Ice House

$10- $20
352.383.4616

Through February 21
Orlando Theatre Works Presents
HANDS ON A HARD BODY
The Garden Theatre

$33 Adult/$29 Students & Seniors
Click Here for Tickets

Through February 21
ART
Mad Cow Theatre

$25-$38
Click Here for Tickets

Through February 21
CHICKEN DOGS I RUFF YOU: A CIRCUS LOVE STORY
The Venue

$15
407.412.6895

Through February 27
I LEFT MY HEART: A TRIBUTE TO TONY BENNETT
Winter Park Playhouse

$25-$40
Click Here for Tickets

Through February 27
DANCING LESSONS
Orlando Shakes

$21 - $46 / $12 Student Rush
Click Here for Tickets

THEATER - NAKED BOYS SINGING
The Central Florida debut of NAKED BOYS SINGING under the Direction of The Footlight Theater’s new Artistic Director, Tim Evanicki.
This hilarious revue features 16 original songs, 7 gorgeous guys, and no clothes – a winning combination if ever there was one! From the sassy opening number “Gratuitous Nudity,” to the screamingly funny “Bliss of a Bris,” audiences and critics alike have hailed “NAKED BOYS SINGING!” as a sure-fire crowd-pleaser.

The show features Broadway veterans, local celebrities, and Original   NAKED BOYS SINGING Cast members from NYC:

James Berkley   William Bruce   Mitchel Burns   Kevin Kelly
Bryan Manley   Joshua Roth   Cannon Starnes

Musical Direction
JOHN GARDNER

Choreography by
PETE SIMPSON
 

TREAT YOUR SWEETHEART to NAKED BOYS for Valentine’s Day! All tickets on Valentine’s Day come with an extensive dessert buffet before the show!

The Parliament House Presents

NAKED BOYS SINGING!

 Directed by
TIM EVANICKI
 

February 5 – March 13, 2016

Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays

Also

Monday, February 29

FOOTLIGHT THEATRE
At The Parliament House

$17- $32

phouse.ticketleap.com

NOTE: While actors in the show are nude a majority of the time, nothing about the show, material, or staging is pornographic in any way whatsoever.

 

THEATER - HANDS ON A HARD BODY
A fresh and unique Broadway musical in which an actual pickup truck takes center stage! For ten hard-luck Texans, a new lease on life is so close they can touch it. Under a scorching sun for days on end, armed with nothing but hope, humor, and ambition, they'll fight to keep at least one hand on a brand-new truck in order to win it. Inspired by true events and nominated for numerous awards, you won't want to miss the Central Florida regional premiere of this high-energy musical infused with rock, country, blues, and gospel that can only be described as “musical theater heaven!”

TheatreWorks Florida Presents

Book by Doug Wright | Lyrics by Amanda Green
Music by Trey Anastasio & Amanda Green
Directed by Scott A. Cook

Featuring WANZeGRAM Subscriber Friend
And Everyone’s Favorite Virgin Mary

JESSICA HOEHN

January 29 – February 21, 2016

Thursdays through Saturdays at 8 PM

Sundays at 2 PM

Industry Night - Monday, February 8 at 8 PM

THE GARDEN THEATRE
160 W. Plant St.
Winter Garden, FL   34787

$33 Adult/$29 Students & Seniors

Discounted Opening & Industry Night & Thursdays

Click Here for Tickets

Comming Attractions

REMAINING TOURING COMPANY PERFORMANCES
IN CURRENT 

FAIRWINDS BROADWAY ACROSS AMERICA SEASON

And Special Season Add-On Performances

KINKY BOOTS

February 23 - February 28

STOMP

March 23 - 24

DIRTY DANCING
March 20 - April 3

BEAUTIFUL

THE CAROLE KING MUSICAL

May 3 - May 8

Other Upcoming Attractions at Dr. Philips Center For The Performing Arts and Bob Carr Theater include

Orlando Philharmonic: THE GARLAND MAGIC

SHEN YUN - GUY FIERI - ANNA IN THE TROPICS

GIRLS NIGHT OUT: THE MUSICAL - PORTRAIT OF A QUEEN

JOSH GROBIN - MOODY BLUES - TONY BENNET

Orlando Ballet:  DON QUIXOTE

GAITHER VOCAL BAND - HERBIE HANCOCK & WAYNE SHORTER

GOOGOOSH LIVE IN CONCERT - IL VOLO

EMERIL LAGASSE - R5 - YANNI - PATTI LABELLE

Orlando Ballet: BEAUTY & THE BEAST

Tickets to all shows listed immediately above may be purchased by calling the Dr. Phillips Center Box Office, or by visiting the Box Office at 445 Magnolia Avenue, Orlando, FL 32801

Mondays through Fridays between 10 AM and 4 PM
or on Saturdays between Noon and 4 PM

Dial: 844.513.2014

or order online:

www.drphillipscenter.org

In the following area you will find opening dates for future attractions at various venues in the Greater Orlando Area so you may plan ahead. Emboldened listings indicate events added as of this edition of your Gram. Shows and Events opening tonight through this coming Monday are listed in the NOW PLAYING section of this edition of your Gram.

February 11 GUY FIERI Dr. Phillips CFTPA
February 11 COMEDY NIGHT with Akeem Woods and Preacher Lawson, Hosted by JEFF JONES Footlight Theatre
February 12 EXPECTING ISABEL Annie Russell Theatre
February 12 R5 Dr. Phillips CFTPA
February 12 MAMA MIA SING ALONG The Abbey
February 12 PAT BENATAR & NEIL GERALDO King Center
February 13 Orlando Philharmonic: BARBER TO BOLERO Dr. Phillips CFTPA
February 14 BLACK HISTORY THROUGH THE ART OF DANCE Dr. Phillips CFTPA
February 13 YANNI Dr. Phillips CFTPA
February 15 SING OUT WITH MISS SAMMY The Abbey
February 18 Live Band: NO ARTIFICIAL FLAVORS Footlight Theater
February 20 PATTI LaBELLE Dr. Phillips CFTPA
February 21 ANNA IN THE TROPICS Dr. Phillips CFTPA
February 21 JAY LENO King Center
February 23 KINKY BOOTS Dr. Phillips CFTPA
February 25 GIRLS NIGHT: THE MUSICAL Dr. Phillips CFTPA
February 27 OUTSIDE MULLINGAR Mad Cow Theatre
February 27 HARLEM GLOBETROTTERS Amway Center
March 2 JOSH GROBIN Dr. Phillips CFTPA
March 4 Natalie Cordone & Shawn Kilgore -SIDE BY SIDE: A Steve Lawrence and Eydie Gorme Tribute Winter Park Playhouse
March 8 MOODY BLUES Dr. Phillips CFTPA
March 9 TONY BENNETT Dr. Phillips CFTPA
March 18 THE SKIVVIES The Abbey
March 18 THE WHALE The Garden Theatre
March 18 GYPSY Sonnentag Theatre at The Icehouse
A Note From Wanzie

I realize those of you who have known me for a long while may be over my mentioning the loss of Ron Kimber every year around Valentine’s Day, but I simply must.

I’ve written reams about what a special spirit Ron was, and indeed that is true, but I am struck to write less about Ron this year, and rather just briefly touch on the gift he gave me for which I will be grateful until I draw my last breath on this earth.

In recent years I have come to realize I no longer mention the loss of Ron from a place of abject sadness, as once was the case. I no longer become completely anxious with the approach of February 14; the date on which he was born, and also the date on which we buried him. I won’t pretend that Valentine’s Day is an easy day for me, but I no longer will myself away from others on the day itself, nor do I any longer require days after to recover from depression. I don’t miss or love Ron any less with the passage of time. And indeed, I still grieve. Even after three decades I still grieve, but that grief comes at totally unexpected times. It catches me off guard and reduces me to tears while watching plays or movies, or visiting a theme park, or hearing a certain song. But as this particular date on the calendar draws near now, I do my utmost best to dial my mind to the gratitude setting. I truly try to think of Valentine’s Day as a celebration of the birth of the young man whom for a brief space of time provided me the passion-filled relationship I had never thought possible between two men, but for which I had so desperately dreamed. Ron Kimber was my dream come true. Thirty years (that seems absolutely impossible to me!) have come and gone since Ron succumbed to AIDS-HIV, and I have never met another who could take his place. And so I am grateful. Grateful to have been touched by him in such a way that I could and did love so fiercely. So…madly.

I may grieve from time to time over the loss of a depth of emotion which I have never again felt for any human being other than Ron, but I am truly grateful to him for the gift of inciting that emotion within me. For empowering me to feel with such intensity, and to love so unashamedly, and so utterly deeply.

So I may experience a twinge of sadness on Valentine’s Day, but I am far from bitter. And I am not in any way resentful. I want happiness for those around me. And when I see couples celebrating on Valentine’s Day, I will do my best not to reflect on what I have lost, but rather remember the amazing love I was privileged to experience. I will look at other couples and truly hope on their behalf that they might be fortunate enough to feel what I was privileged to feel for Ron.

With A Heart Bursting With Gratitude
Dedicating Sunday To My Valentine

RONNIE JOE KIMBER
February 14, 1964 - February 13, 1986

I’m WANZIE And That’s All I Wrote!

 Wanzie Signature Photo

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