Last
chance to see Jeff Jones
perform
before he gets a
new hairstyle!
HELL FREEZES OVER
at the Footlight
Theatre for 3 shows
beginning Tomorrow
Night - Saturday, July 17th
Jeff Jones is HAIRY
Kevin Bee is ANNOYING
Elizabeth Murff is OLDER
THAN CHRIST'S UNDERWEAR
Doug Ba'aser has NEVER BEEN
MORE DEMURE
In
HELL FREEZES OVER
Select-A-Seat Now
|

2009 Wave Award Winner for Favorite LGBT
Blog
|
|
|
|
|
Dear Reader, |
|
We at the
WANZeGRAM hope you will join our entire
staff as Hell Freezes Over tomorrow
night at the PH.
It will be nice to get out of the heat
wave and into an air-conditioned
theater, share some laughs, sip a
cocktail, and maybe snag a little cock.
Or a big one!

|
|
 |
|
| |
|
PH 35 Anniversary Celebration
Highlights |
|
Monday, July 19:
Footlight Players Reunion Show
Featuring
CEZANNE
LEIGH SHANNON
VON GRETCHEN
AYSIA BLACK
MAYA ANDREWS
& THE FOOTLIGHT PLAYERS
In the Disco at 9 PM
Wednesday, July 21:
Employee
Turn-A-Bout Show
To benefit Joy MCC Food Bank
Footlight Theatre at 9 PM
Saturday, July 24:
Hell Freezes Over
Footlight Theatre at 8 PM
(Buy a ticket to see the show; stay for
the party and Expose' for FREE!)
FREE ANNIVERSARY CAKE
In the courtyard at 10:45 PM
Vendors all night long
FOOTLIGHT PLAYERS
SPECIAL ANNIVERSARY SHOW
Pool Stage at Midnight
EXPOSE' - LIVE IN CONCERT!
Pool Stage at 1 AM
|
|
Looking Back at the PH Over the
Years |
|
The
following is a re-printing of a
Parliament House retrospective which
Wanzie was asked to write for inclusion
in the current issue of NOW Magazine
which is now on newsstands at all your
favorite gay & lesbian waterholes:
The Parliament House was a neglected
relic of the pre-Disney era at the time
gay couple and entrepreneurs Bill
Miller and Michael Hodge
bought the failing "motor court" in
1975. The PH had been left to wither
when Interstate-4 opened, and the once
well-traveled Orange Blossom Trail (OBT)
no longer played host to the bulk of the
tourist traffic. When Disney opened in
1974 and visitors wanted to stay as
close to the Magic Kingdom as possible,
that spelled the death toll for the
motel that used to play host to monthly
Rotary Club meetings and garden club
luncheons. As the property values of the
many motels along the OBT plummeted,
Miller and Hodge seized the opportunity
to snag the PH at a bargain price,
creating what, at that time, would be
one of only two openly gay
accommodations and night club complexes
in the United States of America.
As the abandoned OBT fell into decline
and business were shuttered, the
Parliament House was reborn as a gay
mecca; a booming business which has
survived more than three decades through
three sets of owners.
The very private and more
business-oriented Bill Miller died in
1987, leaving the PH to the more
gregarious and beloved Michael Hodge
who, along with resident show hostess
Miss P, was the face of the
Parliament House. When Hodge passed away
in 1992, the property passed to his
family who were not necessarily
spiritually comfortable with owning a
business that catered to
homosexuals...but they did like the cash
flow. Unfortunately, their hands-off
ownership meant the PH fell into serious
decline, and was literally caving in
upon itself when unlikely new owners
Don Granatstein and Susan Unger
acquired the property in 1999.
This straight Jewish couple appeared
very suspect to most longtime PH patrons
who were quite concerned about the
future of their gay fantasyland. And
while the transition from the Hodge
estate to the new Canadian owners was
not without its hiccups, the almost
immediate investment of 2 million
dollars in renovations and clean ups was
an early sign that the Parliament House
was on the fast track to return to its
glory days as a premiere GLBT
destination.
Most notably, Susan Unger immediately
took out the parking lot that separated
the pool from the lodgings and created
"The Courtyard." Guest rooms were
refurnished, new lights and sound were
installed in the Disco and in the
Theater, and beefed up security and new
exterior lighting made the PH inviting
once again. The adjoining Carolina Moon
Trailer Court was razed to make way for
the first phase of THE GARDENS -
America's first alternative lifestyle
vacation ownership resort.
During an Orlando Weekly interview in
2004, the "information officer" of the
Orlando Police Department declared, "The
club (PH) is considered a good partner
in the business community." Sergeant
Orlando Rolan went on to praise the new
owners for helping to "clean-up the
area" and making the PH a "safe place to
visit."
One may only speculate how the
Parliament House will continue to mature
in the future, but it is fun to look
back from whence it came:
The Disco used to be THE BARON OF BEEF
Restaurant where many a real estate
and/or political deal was made over good
wine and prime rib shortly after the PH
opened to the general public. What is
now the video bar used to be THE PANTHER
ROOM, where straight couples could enjoy
cocktails along with live music and
variety acts. What is now the Footlight
Theatre and its adjoining lounge was at
one time a one-level convention and
meeting room where even Tupperware
ladies were known to have rallied. The
dining and meeting complex was called
THE ABBEY, which accounts for the
drunken (cement) monk that still stands
watch on the OBT side of the building
till this day.
When Miller and Hodge re-launched the PH
as a gay entertainment complex, one of
the first businesses located within its
environs was a barber shop situated in
the area which in now The Service
Station bar; it was called THE GAY
BLADE. Over the years, what is now The
Rainbow Cafe operated as SUNSHINE'S,
GRANNIE'S KITCHEN, and even THE DUGOUT.
Though this venerable property has
undergone many changes, the familiar red
and yellow neon, oval-shaped Parliament
House sign has consistently served as a
welcoming beacon to Gays and Lesbians
from around the world for 35 years. That
longevity, and the PH sign itself, stand
as testament to the courage and vision
of Bill Miller and Michael Hodge, who
took a failing motel that catered mostly
to Florida crackers and the family
tourist, and turned it into "The
World's Most Famous all Gay Resort."
|
|
A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words: |
|
Photos courtesy of Official WANZeGRAM
photographer Margo Dixon.
Jeff
Horn's weekly "JEFF'S SPECIAL GUEST" at
BarCodes
Inaugural Guest - Orange County Mayoral
Candidate - LINDA STUART:

CHEW & VIEW at PH:

MISS JACQUELINE JONES at PH:
|
|
Now on Sale in our Box Office
|
QUEEN OF HEARTS
Starring
ELECKTRA HEAVENLY
accompanied by
KELLY RICHARDS
Sunday, July 25
Footlight Lounge
6 PM
Select-A-Seat Now
Hilarious Fringe Hit
Brings Extended Director's Cut to PH
Featuring
never-before-seen material and elements
cut
from
Fringe due to time constraints
TICKETS
NOW ON SALE
Saturdays, July 17 & 24
Industry Night: Monday, July 26
8 PM
$12
(Includes complimentary club
cover for the remainder of the
evening)
Select-A-Seat Now
|
|
We've Got Mail!
|
|
Immigration Tirade Generated Plenty of
Mail:
Wanzie,
Your take on the illegal immigration in
the last WANZeGRAM took me by surprise.
Are you really that naive?
Brad Kelly
Dear Brad,
No, I am that
evolved.
Wanzie
Michael,
I had to read your Note From Wanzie
three times...at least the section about
immigration. You made some excellent
points, and caused me to reconsider my
position as it relates to "a path to
legal citizenship" for the "11 million 'illegals'
already here." Making the point that
none of us who trace our lineage back to
Europe is really here legally was a bit
disturbing at first. I had to go back
and chew on it a couple of more times
before coming to the conclusion that you
are absolutely right. As a white Anglo
Saxon American I feel a sense of
entitlement and the need to protect my
country from these invaders. Your Note
made me realize my great grandparents
were likely viewed as invaders when they
first arrived. I usually read the Wanzie
Gram for fun and entertainment. This
time you made me think, and you helped
change my mind about a very important
social issue. Maybe it's not such a joke
that you are Orlando's spiritual leader.
Sincerely,
David Simmons
Dear David,
Bless you, my son
Wanzie
Wanzie
When will you and all the rest of your
bleeding heart liberal friends stop
apologizing for our country and start
being proud of it? My grandparents came
here legally. Most of the Mexicans have
not. You continually bash this country.
Why don't you leave it if you hate it so
much?"
Sharon Reed
Dear Ms. Reed,
I am always amused that whenever I
suggest that we, as Americans,behave in
a way that bespeaks of the greatness of
our country, there's always some asshole
like you who charges me with not being
proud to be an American.
Grow up!
Wanzie
Michael,
Your take on immigration is essentially the
way I teach the Mexican War, the settlement
(by the US of the Southwest), and the
subjugation of the Indians. It is true that
every one (not most), but every
one of the treaties entered into between
Indians (yes, they prefer that name now) and
the US Government was abrogated by the
Government. Anyone who really wants to read
truth need go no further than Dee Brown's
magnificent and very disturbing "Bury My
Heart at Wounded Knee." For a personal
story try Russell Means' "Where White Men
Fear to Tread." It's interesting we brought
about 500,000 Mexican workers here during
WWII, and again for a time in the '50s,
under a program called the Alien Workers
Program (they were called Braceros), used
them, and sent them back. A key point here
is that legal workers pay taxes, and no
illegals pay taxes (or draw Social Security,
another lie of the Right).
I also agree with you regarding Larry King.
He has been a waste of skin for as long as I
have been aware of his existence. There, I
feel better now.
Mike Dorman
Dear Mike,
Let's deport Larry King!
Wanzie
And Now For Something Completely
Different:
Wanzie,
Nice WANZeGRAM [July 9, 2010]
"Not the best time to leave your puppy or
minor child in the car while you dash into
Whiskey River" That's funny! Does Bruce
Nelson have a puppy?
Also, re: the MBA candidates forum at
"Sheraton Downtown (formerly Radisson) 400
W. Livingston Street;" that hotel was
formerly The Marriott. The newly renamed
Sonesta Hotel on Lake Ivanhoe, WAS a
Sheraton, which was, before that, Radisson
(where Miss Wilson works).
Gary Condor
Dear Gary,
Glad you see the humor
in a child being left in a hot vehicle. As
far as PH pool bartender Bruce Nelson is
concerned; let's hope he does not own a
puppy. The mere fact that he actually drinks
at Whiskey River is reason enough why he
should not be trusted with anyone's life
other than his own. I mean, I'll go into the
package store side of the River in an
emergency, but to actually sit at that bar
where the occasional tranny has been known
to slice the throat of a trucker is not an
acceptable risk in my book.
With regards to the
fact that I mistakenly referred to the
Sheraton Downtown as having formerly been
The Radisson rather than The Marriott; my
thanks to you and the 47 other people who
wrote to point out my error. I stand
corrected, and I feel certain Tim Williams
will be delighted to see he has been called
"Miss" in the WANZeGRAM.
Thanks for reading the
GRAM, and thanks for taking the time to
write in.
WANZIE
We at the WANZeGRAM are always just as
pleased as punch to receive, post, and
answer our mail in this public forum.
But it takes two to play! Send your
email to WANZIE! email
michael@wanzie.com
|
|
Short Takes:
|
|
"Those who can make you believe
absurdities can make you commit
atrocities."
- --Voltair
Submit YOUR Short Take directly
to WANZIE at michael@wanzie.com.Be
sure to type "Short Take" in the
subject line. Short Takes
submissions must be received no
later than midnight on each
Tuesday, for inclusion in the
following Friday GRAM. A strict
limit of 30 words maximum is
imposed. You must provide your
first and last name, which will
be printed following your
submission. Your name will not
figure into your word count. All
postings will be at the sole
discretion of the management
team at the lovely WANZIE.com
World Headquarters, with offices
inconveniently located in
Melbourne, and Lake Mary,
Florida.
|
|
My Two Cents:
|
|
Submit YOUR TWO CENTS: My Two Cents
submissions must be received no later
than midnight on each Monday for
possible inclusion in the next Friday
GRAM. A strict limit of 350 words will
be imposed. Please submit your column
directly to WANZIE at michael@wanzie.com
and kindly type "My Two Cents" in the
subject line.
|
|
|
MUSIC - Toxic Audio Orlando
Concert TONIGHT!
Toxic Audio is back
in Orlando for one harmony screamin',
vocal drum splittin', crazy request
takin' night. Paul, Jeremy, Shalisa,
Geoff, and Michelle are taking the stage
in downtown Orlando. So walk, run,
drive, or crawl to the Harriet Coleman
Center for the Arts at Lake Highland
Prep School to see them!
Use code: fringefriends to
receive 25% off your tickets! With the
discount, tickets are only $15!

Friday, July 16
7:30 PM
Harriet Coleman Center
Lake Highland Prep
901 North Highland Avenue
Orlando, FL 32803
Tickets:
http://toxicaudio.eventbrite.com

COMEDY - Mama's HUGE 1 Year
Anniversary Show!
It's our 1 year anniversary of Mama's -
the weekly comedy showcase at Sleuths
Mystery Dinner Theater (without the
dinner), and they are presenting the
biggest show they can to celebrate! The
producers promise not only great comedy
but also "AMAZING surprises in store for
everyone."
Mama's Comedy Show
1 Year Anniversary Celebration
Friday, July 23
10 PM
Sleuth's Mystery Dinner Theater
8267 International Drive
(Near Ripley's Believe It Or Not)
Orlando, Florida 32819
$10
Reservations: 407.363.1985
MUSIC - Sounds Like Summer
Concert Series
See some of the world's best tribute bands
in the Sounds Like Summer Concert Series, an
annual live event that rocks Epcot theme
park. Hear your all-time favorite hits that
never fail to strike a chord, bringing back
summertime bliss and becoming the timeless
anthems of youth. The Sounds Like Summer
Concert Series brings together a talented
collection of tribute bands that recreate
the chart-topping hits of these legendary
musical icons.
Sounds Like Summer Concert Series 2010:
July 4 - July 10:
Satisfaction - A Tribute to The
Rolling Stones
July 11 - July 17: Slippery
When Wet - The Ultimate Bon Jovi
Tribute
July 18 - July 24: 2U - A
Tribute to U2
July 25 - July 31: Beginnings
- A Tribute to CHICAGO
All performances are at the outdoor
America Gardens Theatre situated just
opposite the American Adventure attraction
on the far side of World Showcase Lagoon.
Nightly Show Times: 5:45 PM, 7:00 PM,
and 8:15 PM (except on July 4)
Concerts are included free, with required
regular EPCOT Park admission
THEATER - Annie
Theatre Downtown production of the
effervescent Broadway musical, based on
Little Orphan Annie, that spawned the
song we love to hate and can't help
humming - "Tomorrow." This Strouse/Charnin
musical first starred Andrea McArdle
in the title role, who was later
replaced by none other than Sarah
Jessica Parker. This bouncy,
delightful musical full of hope and
optimism is perfect summer fare.

Friday,
July 9 through Sunday, August 8
Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays at 8 PM
Sunday Matinees:
July 18 & 25, and August 1 & 8 at 2:30
PM
THEATRE DOWNTOWN
2113 N. Orange Avenue
(At Princeton)
Orlando, Florida, 32804
$18.00 Adult / $15.00 Seniors &
Students
1st Thursday of the production (July 15)
all tickets are only $10.00
Reservations: 407.841.0083
|
|
Comming Attractions |
July 17 Classic Albums
Live: LED ZEPPLIN'S IN THROUGH
THE OUT
DOOR -
Hard Rock Live!
July 21 WEIRD AL YANKOVIC
- Hard Rock Live
July 25
CLAY AIKEN & RUBEN
STUDDARD - King
Center
Aug. 4 JUSTIN BEIBER
Amway Arena
Aug 7 FUDDY MEERS
Footlight Theatre
Aug 7 FIRE & ICE PARTY
- Parliament House
Aug 13 STEEL MAGNOLIAS
Wayne Densch PAC
Aug 21 VEGAS NIGHT -
Parliament House
Aug. 28 RED CHAIR AFFAIR
- Bob Carr PAC
|
|
Now Playing |

Through Aug 14 - MAIN STREET
ELECTRICAL PARADE - Magic
Kingdom
|
|
Performing Arts Reservation Links &
Numbers: |
Our
companion website -
WANZIE.com -
is pleased to host a permanent
listing of Central Florida
theatrical & concert venues, as
well as most area performing
arts companies, with phone
numbers and web links for
ticketing and reservations. If
you are interested in any event
listed in the sections directly
above, you may quickly access
venue/ticketing information when
you
CLICK HERE.
|
|
A Note From Wanzie:
|
Some
guy who had something to do with
baseball died this week.
All I know about baseball is that
there's no crying in it. So just
remember that.
I cried at the end of Toy Story 3.
I cried when Lucy died, and I had
never even met the woman.
I once appeared in a Television
Special with Lucy's daughter Lucy
Arnaz along with Lyle Waggoner, and
Tommy Tune. It was for The
Wonderful World of Disney. It
was one of those hour-long
commercials dressed up like
entertainment touting the grand
opening of Space Mountain in
Florida's Magic Kingdom Park. I'm in
the scene that was filmed in
Adventureland where Lucy is dressed
up like Carmen Miranda signing "I yi
yi yi yi I like you very much,"
and "Yes, We Have No Bananas"
with a group of monkeys from THE
JUNGLE BOOK.
Mowgli, the little boy raised by
Jungle Animals, used to be my
roommate when I lived at Lemon Tree
Condominiums about a hundred years
ago. In fact, I slept with him for
awhile.
He
wasn't really a boy; he just played
one in the three o'clock parade.
There used to be a show that toured
the country called DISNEY ON
PARADE. I took my niece, Lauren
Walsh, to see it at the New Haven
Veterans' Memorial Coliseum in
Connecticut when she was four years
old. Mary Poppins came out of the
movie screen and flew over the heads
of the audience. I cried.
I have always wondered why when
people begin to cry a lot at
funerals and wakes everyone rushes
to calm them down. In America we act
as though there is some sort of
embarrassment or shame if you wail
right out loud and really give in to
the very real pain you can feel on
these occasions. We stifle it. We
try to squelch it. We attempt to
calm the person down. I have never
thought this to be the correct
reaction. After all, the purpose of
the viewing and the funeral isn't
really for the deceased; it is for
those who are staying behind and
suffering the loss. So why don't we
allow ourselves to express our pain
and suffering and move through it?
I don't mean to be racist, but I
have heard that at many an African
American funeral there can be a
great deal of wailing, and gut
wrenching crying, and flailing
about, and screaming. I've never
been to a funeral like that, but I
do know that when my lover died,
sounds came out of me I myself had
never heard before. I wanted
desperately to scream and just let
it all out, but I was surrounded by
people who were insistent I get
control of my emotions, and till
this day I wonder why that was. I
was immobile for months afterwards,
and I often think that had I been
free to purge my body of that pain
when it was coming to the surface of
its own accord at the funeral, I
might have recovered from my loss
more quickly.
It's
odd. Nobody tells anyone else to
calm down when they yell and scream
and show all manner of emotion
during Monday Night Football, but
god forbid you get worked up at a
funeral home. We are so strange the
way we put parameters on mourning in
this country. (Oops. There I go;
bashing America again. Perhaps I
should just leave and move to a
country where people throw
themselves on caskets and wail
openly in the streets when someone
dies.) I honestly think that type of
behavior to be more normal (and
healthier) given the circumstances,
than sitting quietly trying
desperately to NOT make a scene. To
not be too loud.
I just realized its probably all
that bottled up emotion and held
back tears from all the restraint
I've been forced to bridle myself
with at funerals over the years that
causes me to so readily cry when the
image of Walt Disney floats across
the screen during the finale of The
American Adventure.
Or, maybe I'm just a cry baby.
I'm not sure. But I do know "There's
no crying in baseball!"
I'm WANZIE and
That's All I Wrote!
2009 Wave Award Winner for
Favorite Local Spiritual Leader
|
|
| |
| |
|
|
|